The devil and the deep blue sea
by 1alucard1
Summary: Lucifer gets a cold for the first time in his life. Predictably, he is a total drama queen about it. Chloe takes care of him. Typical sickfic stuff.


"-and that's why you killed her!", Lucifer finished triumphantly, delighted at his own genius.

Their suspect looked for a moment like he might deny everything, then he apparently changed his mind and shoved Lucifer, who was standing closest to him, with all his might into the large pool next to them. Lucifer made a surprised _oomph_ noise, loosing his balance.

Chloe reached for him but it all happened to quickly. The suspect made a run for it. Chloe used all of her will power to keep herself from watching Lucifer fall flailing and yelling into the pool in favour of chasing after the murderer. It was not in vain. The man wasn't in the best shape and she managed to take him down when he was barely out of the door of his villa.

She returned inside, handcuffed suspect in tow, to find a dripping wet Lucifer pushing himself up out of the pool. He stood up, and shook himself much like a dog trying to get dry, and Chloe chuckled.

Lucifer glared first at their suspect, then at her. "Oh, this is funny, is it? Look at this!" He moved his arm down and a bit of water sloshed out of the sleeve of his suit jacket. "Ruined!"

Chloe put her hand in front of her mouth, trying in vain to keep the laughter at bay. Lucifer looked very adorable, radiating righteous fury, while his wet hair was sticking out in all directions and water was dripping from his suit. His dress shirt stuck to his torso in a way that she'd rather not reflect on while at work, thank you very much, so she focussed her attention back to his general adorableness.

He tried to smooth his hair back and only succeeded in making it stick out at an even weirder angle. Chloe lost the ongoing battle and gave in to the laughter. Instead of being angry or miffed about her reaction, he smiled. It was one of the things she'd always liked about him. That he always delighted in making others happy, even if it was at a cost to his own dignity.

"Well, what's fair is fair", he said, advancing on them. Chloe took a step back, for some reason thinking that he planned to throw her into the water. Instead he grapped the suspect by the shirt and easily dragged him to the edge of the pool.

"Lucifer!", Chloe hissed, the merriment gone. "He's handcuffed. He can't swim."

Lucifer dunked him, one-handedly, into the water and _lifted him back out again_ in one smooth movement and all Chloe could do was stare at him, her mouth hanging open. He kept doing these random displays of strength and she kept being surprised by it, even though she should know better by now. He was much stronger than he looked. Her eyes were drawn back to the white dress shirt stuck to his torso. She shook her head, willing herself to let it go.

"Right. Better call this in", she said, looking everywhere but at Lucifer.

* * *

Shortly after, the place was swarming with units. They found the murder weapon, badly hidden behind the toilet. The guy confessed even before they had a chance to put him in the car and take him away. Chloe looked after the police car for a moment, with the strange mixture of emotions she always felt when closing a case, the satisfaction of having found the person responsible warring with the sadness of the irrevocable crime itself.

She started to leave when she heard Lucifer talking to one of her colleagues behind her. She turned around, surprised. She'd assumed he'd have left long ago. She walked over to him.

"Are you crazy? It's already getting dark. You'll catch your death like this."

Lucifer scuffed. "Oh please. I haven't become _that_ mortal. A bit of water isn't going to snuff me out."

"I didn't mean you'll literally catch your death. You'll get sick."

Lucifer snorted. "I don't get _sick_. That's an entirely human affliction. I'm impervious to all and any type of plague. Always have been. And besides- _aaa-CHOO_ "

The shocked expression spreading over his face was truly priceless. " _Bloody hell_. What was that?"

"You're honestly going to stand there and tell me you have never sneezed before?"

"Don't be ridicolous, detective. Do you know how much coke I've snorted? It's an occupational hazard, but this- this felt -aa - _aaaa-choo_ "

"Right, that's it. I'm taking you home and you're getting out of these clothes right now."

The shocked expression turned sultry, his lip lifting up in a small smirk. He opened his mouth to reply, but Chloe raised her hand. "Don't. I'm well aware I walked right into that one."

* * *

"Lucifer? Where are you?"

Chloe had received a text from him about an hour ago, which read, simply _Help. I'm dying._ She'd asked for clarification, but it had just been radio silence after that. She wasn't worried, not really. After all, he had a bit of a tendency to overdramatize things. But better save than sorry, she thought, and used her first break to come by Lux to check on him.

"Lucifer?"

She heard a bout of coughing from his bedroom. "Over here."

Chloe followed the noise. On the bed was a huge pile of thick blankets. It was difficult to spot Lucifer, seeing as not much more than his head from the nose up stuck out from under the pile.

"Detective. Help me." His dramatic tone would have been funny, if he hadn't sounded so worried. Chloe narrowly kept herself from telling him _I told you so_.

"What's wrong?", she asked, voice carefully neutral.

"What's _wrong_?" Lucifer repeated incredulously, lifting himself up on his elbows. "What's wrong is that while running around with _you_ I've contracted some deadly influenza!"

Chloe gaped at him. "Unbelievable. You think this is _my_ fault? Seriously?"

"Of course it is, detective." He coughed again. "I most certainly got infected with this while working with you. Trust me."

"Oh really? People in your club don't get sick, do they? Hmm? And standing around dripping wet for _hours_ didn't have anything to do with it either, right? Obviously, because there is always somebody else to blame for your problems, isn't there? You know, I came here to check on you because I was worried, but I can see you're your usual charming self, so'll I get back to work now."

She whirled around and stomped off. She was almost at the elevator, when she heard something behind her.

"What was that?"

"'m sorry."

Chloe's eyebrows shot up. Well, he must be feeling truly miserable for him to actually admit to being wrong, let alone apologize. Some of her anger dissipated. She sighed and walked back.

She found Lucifer sitting up in bed, pouting. "My actions might have contributed to my current predicament", he admitted grudingly. He sneezed three times in rapid succession, then shivered. " _Bloody hell._ How do you bear this? I've had bad days in hell where I've felt much better than _this_."

"You've never been sick?"

"Perks of a supernatural constitution." He sneezed again. "You've got to help me, detective. How do I get rid of this?"

"Well, you just rest for a couple of days-"

"Days? This lasts for _days_?" The entirely horrified expression on his face would suggest that she had just informed him of some terminal illness. Chloe bit the inside of her cheek to keep herself from laughing at him.

"Oh, it's not that bad. Stop being a drama queen about it." "I'm not a drama-" He was interrupted by another bout of coughing.

He looked at her pleadingly, somehow managing to look like a helpless puppy dog. "What's happening to me, detective?"

Chloe took pity on him. She sat down at the edge of the bed. "Okay, listen. I'll make you a cup of tea and once I'm off work I'll go get some cold medicine for you. You'll feel much better in no time, alright?"

He nodded miserably. Chloe sighed. What was it with men and colds, anyway? Dan was the same, suffering every time as if this was the worst disease that had ever befallen anybody in the history of humanity. Figures that Lucifer would be the same.

* * *

She enlisted Maze's help to watch Trixie for the evening. Trixie was delighted at the suggestion, which left Chloe feeling a little suspicious. One of these days she'd really have to check up on what Maze considered appropriate activities for children.

"Lucifer? I've brought some medicine for you."

All she got in reply was a groan from the bedroom. She took a glass from the bar and filled it with water in the sink in the bathroom. Then she took it and some things out of the bag she'd brought with her to Lucifer.

He looked terrible, pale and shivering under the covers. She put her hand on his forehead and he felt incredibly warm as if he had a high fever. It was something she'd dealt with many times with Trixie, but she thought it was quite unusual for an adult to get such a high temperature so quickly. Maybe this was something more serious than a cold?

Lucifer sighed, leaning into her touch.

"How do you feel?"

"'m freezing", he rasped.

"Okay. C'mon, sit up and take these. Then drink this water." He did as he was told without arguing or even making a comment about being ordered around and Chloe's worry increased tenfold.

"You've really never been sick?"

"No", he replied, uncharacteristically monosyllabic.

Chloe imagined him growing up in some mansion, home-schooled, never exposed to many other children, never getting a chance to catch a cold from them. If he hadn't build up immunity as a child, wouldn't that explain why his immune system was going into overdrive immediately now? She decided she would keep a close eye on him and get him to a doctor in case his condition deteriorated further.

She sat down on the bed close to where his head was sticking out from under the blanket pile. "You should try to sleep."

"C- can't. 'm too cold."

"Should I read you a bedtime story?"

He opened one eye and somehow mustered up the energy to glare at her. "F- funny. I'm glad my misery is a- amusing to you."

"Sorry, couldn't resist. So, is there anything I can do to help you feel better?"

"Well, there is one thing I could think o- of-" He coughed violently. "Actually, ne- never mind. I don't think 'm up for t- that at the moment."

"Oh dear. I wasn't aware things were quite so dire", Chloe deadpanned. The corner of his mouth twitched into a small smile.

"'fraid so."

"And today of all days, when I would have actually been in the mood. Shame.", she added dryly.

"D- don't kick a man when he's already down, detective. That's b- bad form."

"Sorry. I'll go and make you some soup now, and you'll eat it."

"Yes, ma'am", he said with only a hint of mockery.

"And by _make_ , I mean _warm up_ soup that somebody else made", she added.

"Wouldn't have expected anything less, d- detective."

* * *

He actually did eat a little of the soup. She suspected more to make her happy than out of any real hunger, but still, it was something. He continued burning up and she kept herself busy trying to get as much water as possible into him. It was getting late and she really would have liked to go home, take a shower and go to bed. But she didn't like leaving him like this. She'd woken him up 20 minutes ago to take some more pills and drink something and he had been almost delirious, talking in a language she didn't recognize. It took several minutes before the fog cleared a little and he recognized her and his surroundings. She told him it was time to see a doctor but he had been adamant that he wouldn't, which didn't really leave her with a lot of options.

If things got really bad, she could always call in an ambulance. Given that she was still here, that is. She sighed and gave Maze a call to let her know that she wasn't coming home tonight.

She was busy setting up her bed on the couch when she heard a muffled yell from the bedroom. She rushed over there. Lucifer was tangled up in the blankets, throwing himself from one side to the other, clearly caught in some fever dream. Well, fever nightmare, by the looks of it.

He suddenly threw up his arm and yelled " _Detective_ ", voice filled with anguish and despair. Chloe thought he was talking to her, but then she saw that his eyes were still closed. He screamed and his eyes flew open. Chloe put a hand on his shoulder, trying to sooth him. There was blind panic in his eyes until they found hers. He let his arm drop down and put his hand over hers on his shoulder. "Detective", he rasped, voice raw.

"It's fine. Everything's fine. It was just a dream."

" _Bloody hell_ ", he cursed, rubbing his other hand over his eyes.

"How do you feel?"

"Like one of the poor sods in hell after Maze is done with them."

Well, on the plus side he was at least well enough again to complain about how bad he was feeling.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes, looking around. "What time is it?"

"Almost midnight."

"What are you still doing here?" He sounded pleasantly surprised.

"Your fever was pretty bad, I didn't want to leave you unattended. Here, you should drink some water." She helped him up and he downed the proffered glass.

"Thank you", he said and she knew he didn't mean just the water. He was still pale, coated in sweat and shivering slightly, but at least he was lucid and aware of his surroundings. Chloe suddenly felt like she might be intruding. After all, she had just decided to stay here without consulting him. She got up and stood next to the bed.

"Um- maybe- maybe it's best if I go and let you get some rest."

He pouted. He really must be getting better if he was already back to the pouting, Chloe thought.

"But then who is going to distract me from my misery?", he whined, pulling an exaggerated sad face.

Chloe sighed. "Fine. We can watch some Netflix on the couch."

He raised an eyebrow. "Sex on the couch, you say?"

Chloe rolled her eyes. "Your innuendos have lost quite some of their usual sophistication."

He grinned at her. "You think my innuendos are usually sophisticated?"

Chloe groaned. "You never give up, do you?"

"Never."

They settled on the couch, close but not quite touching. They had watched all of ten minutes when Chloe felt his head sag against her shoulder and he was back to sleep. She slowly and carefully disentangled herself and draped the blankets over him, making sure he was comfortable.

She felt his forehead but it seemed the fever had broken. She was sure he'd be alright on his own now, but she still felt uncomfortable leaving him. He'd seemed back to his usual self, but she could tell that whatever he'd dreamed had unsettled him deeply. And the way he seemed to be genuinely baffled at the smallest kindness shown, like he didn't expect anybody to care enough about him, always nudged at her caregiver instincts. No, she really didn't want to leave him. But she had to get to work tomorrow and take Trixie to school in the morning and ideally, she would like to catch some sleep before then. She sighed and took a last look at him, sleeping peacefully on the couch, then snuck out of the loft.

* * *

The next day was crazy and she didn't get a minute to catch a breath until late in the afternoon. She'd heard no life sign from Lucifer the whole day. Which didn't have to mean anything. He was probably busy sleeping, recovering from his fever ordeal. She meant to give him a call but then she got called in to a crime scene only a few blocks away from Lux and decided to check in on him in person afterwards.

The elevator doors opened, revealing a seemingly empty loft. "Lucifer?"

He appeared at the top of the marble steps, smiling. "Detective!" He was still paler than usual, but otherwise looked much better. He was wearing a black silk bathrobe and his hair was a complete mess. It made him look much younger.

"I see you're feeling better."

He grinned. "Quite right. Can't keep me down long. Well, _you_ could, if you wanted to, naturally."

Chloe chuckled in spite of herself. "Right. All recovered, then?"

"Absolutely. I-" He was interrupted by a couple of sneezes. "-well, possibly not entirely recovered."

Chloe's phone rang and she picked it up. Another case. What the hell was going on in this city today? She hung up, noticing Lucifer watching her, an unreadable expression on his face.

"I've got to go." He nodded, and she turned to leave.

"Detective." She turned around again, giving him a look to get on with it already when he hesitated. "I- um-" She crossed her arms, waiting for him to get out whatever he wanted to say. He lifted up his hand and scratched himself behind his ear, a nervous gesture she couldn't recall ever seeing him do before. He succeeded in messing up his hair even further.

"I just wanted to say thank you." He hesitated so long that Chloe almost thought that was all he was going to say. "You- hm- nobody has ever done anything like that for me before. So, thank you." Before she had a chance to reply, he turned around and all but fled back to his bedroom.

"You're welcome", she mumbled, a little stunned how could have gotten to this point in his life without anybody ever taking care of him. She stared after him for a moment, then shook her head slightly, and went back to work.


End file.
